Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Megalomaniacal Rants? MOI?

I was rather distressed at having to miss the gathering of my mad scientist and evil genius colleagues in SteamSkyCity this past weekend, but Mr. Volare informed me that I seemed to have won for "Best Manifesto/Rant." I would not say that I "rant". If it seems disturbing or overly long to the other party present, then I suppose that is their perception of what I see as my rather politely discussing my concerns and such. For those of you who have not read my supposed award-winning "rant" for yourself, I have published it in its entirety here:

"I am Dr Malegatto Alter, evil genius supervillain mastermind.

Caledon is a lovely nation. It would be even lovelier if its citizens trembled in fear every time they heard my name. I will take the credit for starting the Great Tamrannoch Asylum Uprising a few months ago as I needed to hurry up and return to my workshop. I did not expect Scary Robbie to go on such a violent rampage. It's amazing what a motivator carrots can be to an oversized pink rabbit.

As for my recent "Minion Incident"? No comment. All that I shall say is that it is hard to find a good minion nowadays. Aspiring to "henchman" status can get an overambitious one in a lot of trouble. I repeat, a LOT of trouble. If you know any good potential minions, do send one my way. I am always looking...

As for my inventions? Do expect to see more in the near future.

As for my plans? Pfft! Like I'd expound upon them here! Do I look crazy to you? No, do not answer that.

I am not called "Evil Tiny Kitty" for nothing!"


Darien Mason said...

*claps respectfully*

YOW!! Forgot to withdraw the bionic syringe...


Frau Lowey said...

I think it might be much easier for you to hire from the Minion's Union Job Board after the statute of limitations on the Incident expires in three years.

I will keep an eye out, as I try to have replacements on call in the unlikely event that things should turn... awkward at His Excellency's facilities.

To be brutally honest, though - until you offer paid death leave, it will be slim pickings. Have you considered building your own?

Baron K. Wulfenbach said...

[notes listings in sidebar]

'Like mind'? Hrmph. You should be half as fortunate.

Evil Tiny Kitty said...

*chuckles at the Baron*
I appreciate the honesty of one whose ego seems to be as huge as my own.

Yes, Frau Lowey, I have considered going the "build-a-minion" route. I'll keep you posted...

And my God, Doctor! *puts a paw over her face* Don't make it easy for our enemies by taking YOURSELF down!

Baron K. Wulfenbach said...

Fraulein Alter,

I, at least, have earned my expression of ego. [gestures at a peaceful, moderately well-behaved Europe and an extremely talented and well-prepared son]


Klaus Wulfenbach, Baron

Evil Tiny Kitty said...

Egads, sir...I am in AGREEMENT with you and your accomplishments, remember? As to whether or not I have "earned" my ego, that shall remain to be seen.